


Finding each other

by ProjectPidgeon



Category: BBC Merlin, Merlin (TV)
Genre: AU, Alternate Universe - Reincarnation, BBC, BBC is a destroyer of souls, Bradley James - Freeform, Bromance, Colin Morgan - Freeform, Emotions, Epic Bromance, Feels, Filming, Hurts So Good, I Blame Tumblr, I Will Go Down With This Ship, I cried writing this, I'm Bad At Tagging, Immortal Merlin, M/M, POV Merlin, Pain, Poor Merlin, Protective Merlin, Reincarnation, Reunited and It Feels So Good, Sad, Their Love Is So, What Have I Done, alternative universe, bros
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2019-02-05
Updated: 2019-03-05
Packaged: 2019-10-23 00:06:53
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Major Character Death
Chapters: 2
Words: 4,021
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/17672648
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/ProjectPidgeon/pseuds/ProjectPidgeon
Summary: All those video diaries that Colin and Bradley made together from a Merlin and Arthur perspective in a modern AU.Merlin crosses paths with Bradley James. He is the spitting image of Arthur, since Merlin had taken the name Colin he had also persuade acting and when the two of them begin to work together Merlin is made more and more certain that this man is in fact his Arthur.He misses his Arthur, hidden beneath the name of Bradley but sometimes, just sometimes Bradley slips into his onscreen character a bit too well and continues off screen, to Merlin's delight.Each of these precious moments, Merlin takes the liberation of filming, documenting the small moments they share as if they have both grown together with the world.





	1. Seeing his face once more

**Author's Note:**

> Ok so first Merlin Fanfiction but I'm super proud of this.   
> I cried whilst writing it so I hope others like it too.

Merlin had spent millennia alone, travelling the length and breadth of the country, seeing his world fall apart and change, without him he just had himself, everything in this world was so temporary. 

When Camelot fell he was forced to begin his journey, moving from village to village, offering his small assistance where he could, trying to find a true meaning to it all. Ever in the hope that as the legends foretold, in Camelot's darkest hour, when he was needed most, Arthur would return, the rightful king, to lead his people when all seemed lost. He waited and he traveled, trying to make a life for himself in each era. 

It was now at least 1400 years after his death, and Merlin had taken the name Colin, Colin Morgan yet another name as the faces around him changed. He enrolled to learn the trade of acting, He supposed he had been acting all his life. First hiding his magic, then hiding his activities when trying to protect Arthur and now living the lie of a normal person, one who hasn't roamed these lands and seen the rise and fall of the people around him. 

Colin had been looking for work in the film and tv industry but when the BBC advertised the casting call for a new tv series, a medieval narrative about the legends of Camelot. The roles offered were varying but from the brief script he was given it seemed to follow Merlin, him and how he upheld the guise of non-magic to protect the young and arrogant Prince. 

The day Colin received his script was a very peculiar day. It came through the mail and he was able to look over it whilst he ate his breakfast, reading the dialogue was almost like reliving the memories of his time with Arthur. Each scene reflected the times, the terms a bit modern but it felt the same. 

The day of the audition arrived and he met some of the actors who had come in the hopes of being the next BBC star. Colin made his way round to the drinks stand, making himself a cup of tea when he saw a tall blonde in his peripheral vision. He turned slowly, seeing a young man, identical to the one he was destined to protect till his dying breath, now stood before him. 

"Alright." The blonde haired man said with a bright smile, seeing Colin staring up at him with wide eyes, and an slack jaw. 

"Uh hello, sorry. Would you like a drink?" Colin said quickly averting his eyes from the bright eyed man. 

"It's alright, I've got it." He said pouring himself a tea and motioning to the now full cup with a grin. "I'm Bradley by the way." 

"I.. I'm Colin. I'm sorry you look like an old friend of mine." Colin subconsciously scratched at the back of his head, offering his hand in greeting. 

Bradley took his hand heartily, clapping Colin on the back. "Nice to meet you Colin. I'll see you around." He said before turning away and moving back into the crowd of other auditionees. 

"Yeah, it's been nice." Colin murmured after him, staring at the tea. He was the modern version of Arthur, he acted like him, he looked like him. He moved to the corner, sipping at his tea. If he could get this role, he'd be able to live out his life as Merlin on screen. If it was even remotely similar to his life it would be enough. 

"Colin Morgan! Oh come right this way." A short man directed him into the side room, with a panel of people. 

"Good morning Colin, if we could get you to read the two passages we asked you to prepare, one of Arthur and the other for Merlin please." The man on the end of the row asked encouragingly. 

Colin set his resolve, after his meeting with Bradley he had to get this role, the real Merlin should be able to play himself, just as the real Arthur will gain his role, who better is there, even if nobody knows who they are, not even Bradley. It's all worth it. 

"Thank you Colin, that was certainly the characterisation we have been looking for. We'll give you a call." Colin was shown his way out but he knew the way he had portrayed both characters was ideal, he had analysed every drop of information he could find about the writer, the style they had expressed in the script and how Arthur and he had survived the turbulent realm of Camelot. 

Colin went home that day with a heart filled with hope, the hope that Bradley would get the role, the hope that he could preform side by side with his Arthur. 

Colin sat at home, sifting through his old stuff, trying to find his box of memories, each life had it's own box but right now what he needed was his box filled with the remnant's of Camelot, his first home. He hadn't been able to open it in so long, it became too painful without Arthur by his side. How could he have held Arthur's cloak, hold his king's emblem, there was no way up until now he could have read through Gauis many books that he had left to him. Meeting Bradley, Arthur had changed that. The yearning to return to his side pushed Colin to need the objects of his life around him.

After an hour of searching and opening boxes he found the battered, dusty cardboard box that concealed the large plastic wrapped chest. 

Heaving the box into the center of now cluttered room with the array of boxes. He carefully pulled the the plastic bag he had used to protect the ancient chest along with his magic to try to keep it as eternal as he was. He moved to lift the heavy chest from it's box, kicking it aside to lay the chest down with a huff of exertion. 

His fingers danced along the cool wood, coming to rest on the against the heavy lock. His hands lifted it tenderly, reticently as he pulled the key from around his neck, taking off the leather strap it hung from. 

He bought the key to the lock and his hand shook slightly, enough to scrape against the iron as he attempted to unlock it. His phone rang out in the hallway, the shrill sound played once before he discarded the key upon the box, picking his way out of his room till he reached the phone. 

He took a moment to compose himself, a breath in and he answered the phone. "Hello?" 

"Hello, is this Colin Morgan?" The voice on the other end asked. 

"Yes, it's Colin." He said anxious with the anticipation, it had to be the tv studio. 

"I'd like to inform you that you've been asked back for a screen test, you gave a very emotive audition and they feel that you might work well with someone who they also felt was right for the show." The voice responded, sounding happy to be able to deliver such positive news. Colin's heart soared, he had been given a call back. 

"Thank you, I'm so glad it went well." Colin wasn't sure what to say, if he could work with this other actor he could have a job, living a former life. 

"Well, congratulations. Same studio a week Friday. Thank you, have a good day sir." The line cut of and Colin was left alone in the silence of his house. He always assumed that he'd enjoy the peace and quiet, his own space. Not having to run around after Arthur in constant peril but when he left Camelot he found he longed for the bustle of the market place, someone calling on him for a task. Gaius forcing him from his bed to fetch one herb or another from the outskirts of the forest. 

He tiptoed past the assortment of boxes, till he could sink down on his knees before the chest. He lifted the key, holding his hand steady, his new found determination overpowering the sea of emotions, threatening to wash over him and engulf him in the pain and sorrow of the past. 

He pressed the key to the lock, knowing he had to go through with this, he couldn't just hide it all away in a box forever. The old lock clicked, allowing him the pull the lock free from the chest. 

Colin let his fingertips brush across the lid of the lip before he lifted it carefully. Sitting back on his haunches he looked at the contents of the chest. The deep red of the Pendragon crest lay on the top of the other items. Arthur's cloak, still in the best condition as if he had only worn it yesterday. If Colin couldn't remember the centuries alone he could believe that it was just yesterday. 

He lifted the cloak, allowing it to lie across his lap. Colin held the cape close to him, grasping at the soft fabric to his chest. His eyes stung as he tried to hold himself together. What would Arthur say if he saw him like this. He'd probably say something like "you dollophead, don't cry." or "Stop being such a girl Merlin, I'm still here." Tears streaked down his face as he thought of Arthur, all that he'd say seeing him sobbing over his cloak, alone and never moving on from him. 

He stayed there like that, remembering everything they had gone through together, right up until his final moments, how Merlin had held him close, willing life into his limp body. The days that came afterwards, the numb ache in his chest. Gaius had let him stay in his room for the week, Gwen visiting each day in the hope she could be there, with Merlin. That they could share that burden. On that day they had after all both lost their king and their best friend. 

Merlin couldn't face her, they sat on opposite sides of the door, holding onto the memories they shared. They spent the best part of the hours in silence, occasionally sharing tearful stories of their adventures with Arthur. Gauis had been leaving food for Merlin, hoping he'd leave his room at least once to eat a little bit of food, but it had been to no avail. A week into Merlin's isolation, Gaius had demanded he be allowed into Merlin's room. He had tried his best to keep the old man from entering but slumped back on the bed as the door creaked open ajar. 

Gauis had taken one look at him, seeing the normally pasty but bright boy, sickly weak and struggling to do anything more than look up at Gauis. He had sat beside Merlin, encouraging him to eat with kind words. Merlin just sat there, his eyes sore and puffy as silent sobs wracked his body, his face covered in salty paths, his hair a disheveled mess.   
Over the next few weeks he had slowly began to eat little bit's, He had began to pack up Arthur's stuff, Gwen was crowned Queen of Camelot and he was left without his purpose.   
Merlin had traveled ever since. Moving with the times, right till now. He opened his eyes, the eyes that had seen a thousand worlds. He looked down with a sad smile at the cloak he was still clinging too. With a sour chuckle he set it aside, glad that he had finally been able to open the chest again. 

Beneath where the cloak had laid was the stack of books that, they had still not fully be accepted in Camelot and couldn't have been left on the shelves of Gauis's work room, their discovery would have tarnished his legacy. 

There was a smaller box, he had put Arthur's ring in it, Gwen had insisted he kept it in his memory when he had tried to present it to her. She had also left him her bracelet, a small silver piece, encrusted with a a few small gemstones but Colin couldn't face opening that box today, not yet. 

Colin took the time to replace the items, he had to return all these boxes then he could possibly take the time to really look through this chest. He set about clearing his room, boxes being organised beneath his bed, at the bottom of his wardrobe, under the stairs and in the loft. He had known oh too well where he had left the box. He had always kept it in his room but going through the other boxes provided the distraction he had needed. 

The evening he had eaten before loading up his computer, he settled at the desk. He wanted to find this Bradley, though he didn't have much to go off of other than a first name and his appearance, a face he could never forget. 

He set about searching through the internet, he's an actor, British and his name is Bradley. He scanned through facebook searching for someone matching his brief profile. A message pinged, startling him from his search till he read the alert. 

Bradley's name along with a small photo of him had sent a message request. Colin opened it immediately, accepting the request and reading through Bradley's message. Bradley James.

'Hey Colin, I was wondering if you had a call back yet I know technically I shouldn't be asking but still.' Read the message. Colin thought a moment, dread running through him that this message could mean the Bradley hadn't received a call, what if it wasn't him that had been selected. 

'I have. Does this mean you haven't had a call?" Colin responded with. He waited anxiously for his response watching the little dots move as Bradley typed. 

'I have! I'm glad it's you. sorry this comes off a little weird but I just felt we could work really well together.' Came the anticipated response. 

'Congratulations, sorry for not saying too much when we first met, I got a little jittery over the audition.' Bradley sent a small smiling face. 

'Guess I'll see you a week Friday then.' Bradley replied. 

'Sure will, it was good to talk to you Bradley' Colin stretched away from the computer with a broad smile. He hadn't had to find him, Bradley must have felt the pull between them as he had. He had found him, after all this time. Deep down this must mean he remembers something of Merlin, He remembers him, even if he doesn't know it yet.   
Colin was able to sleep peacefully, knowing that there was a glimmer of hope of finding Arthur within Bradley.


	2. Bradley meets Merlin

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> So in this chapter Bradley continues his acquaintance with Colin and they begin to work on their characters together during a screen test, the original rough script presenting them an opportunity to share their chemistry.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hope you enjoy Xxx I know I've been enjoying writing this! x

The screen test came round painfully slowly for Colin but on that fateful Friday he woke tight chested, through the night he had been suffering with the nightmares of his past. Seeing Arthur dying in his arms but he saw Bradley, in his modern clothes. Their bond close once more but he now laid in his arms, gasping for breath as Colin held his head in his hands, screaming for someone, anyone to come and help him. He couldn't loose him again. 

He sat up, clutching the sheets as tears continued to roll down his face. He wouldn't loose Arthur it just wouldn't happen, these horrific and vivid dreams shouldn't hold any power over him during the day, it was just his mind he has power over that in the day time. His mind continued holding the images, his death playing out before him every time he thought of anything, trying to leave his bed, even trying to will his tears to stop. It all bought it back. 

He managed to leave bed, calming himself and taking the time to make his breakfast. Colin sat their eating, thinking about all the things he'd have to say to Arthur, after all this time he just wanted his friend back. 

He moved forward to the day, picking out jeans and a smart t-shirt before taking a shower. He lent against the wall, taking a steady breath as the water cascaded down his body. What if Arthur didn't remember, what would happen even if he could. He's lived a new life, a life without him. He stood there, laying his head back against the wall, he can't keep doing this, letting his mind overtake reality. He's got to just focus on what he can do rather than the fear of what he can't do. 

He finished the shower, his plan set out firmly in his mind. He just has to go through with this and try his beast, Bradley had already reached out to him, if this was going to work he couldn't continue to hold onto the pain in this way. 

 

When he arrived Bradley was already in the room, helping himself to a biscuit before he saw Colin walk in. "Hello mate, it's good to see you again, it's just me you and another guy. I think they said it was Anthony Head Stewart." He said, taking another biscuit. 

"Hey,Arth... Bradley." Colin smiled nervously at calling him Arthur. 

"Ain't got the part yet Colin." Bradley laughed "Don't jump the gun." he said coming to sit near where Colin stood. Colin grinned glad that Bradley had taken it in his stride.   
"Yeah, sorry. I think you've got a pretty good chance though, I mean if it's only the three of us then there's no way I'm meant to be Arthur is there." Bradley gave him a look that said he didn't quite believe it but didn't want to argue with someone he barely knew. 

"So change of subject but where you from?" Bradley said, offering Colin a biscuit. Colin took it with a grin. 

"Ireland, but I studied over here." He replied. 

"Sorry to interrupt but we're ready for the screen test." The two men got up quickly as the man held the door open for them. 

"Good morning Bradley, Colin. So today we just want to see the onscreen chemistry, how you work together." The man passed a script to Colin and Bradley. "I don't expect you to do it all but just do as much as you can preform between the two of you." He moved to sit back in his seat. 

The two had a quick read through before moving to stand, muttering to each other the stage directions they felt the should follow. 

"I'll play Merlin this time round and if you want we can switch after." Colin announced, earning a nod from both the director and Bradley. 

Both Colin and Bradley moved from the center of the room, standing at opposite sides. Colin stepped forward, script in hand as he acted out the scene, he walked with purpose till he reached the center of the large dance hall. He then paused, looking up before continuing, weaving slightly in his imaginary street, on hand on the strap of an imaginary pack on his back. He moved round the room, looking about at this new place, nodding at points around the room with a smile at people he thought might be in the scene, much like how he had first entered Camelot. Overwhelmed with the bustling street.

He continued his route till Bradley walked into his path, making a point of knocking his firm shoulder into Colin. He stumbled back as Bradley continued his leisurely strides. Colin whirled round to look at Bradley who had just barged into him with a disgusted face. 

"Excuse me, you mustn't have seen me here, but you seem to have walked into me." Colin called, gripping the bag tighter. Bradley turned slowly, tilting his head as if no one had ever spoken to him like that. Glancing at his script briefly Bradley's body language shifted to show he was further put out by this inconvenience, slouching back slightly with a cocky air. 

"You were in the way." He responded with a an eye roll, laughing and encouraging the other men to join in the mockery. "I warn you I have been trained to kill from birth." Bradley said as his hand motioned to his side. 

"How long have you been training to be a prat." Colin quipped back with a grin, remembering the rush he had felt back chatting Arthur, feeling he had the quicker mind over this man once. 

Bradley frowned then let out a chuckle "You can't say that, I am royalty." He seemed aghast at such a comment, trying to laugh it off cooly. 

"Oh I'm sorry, how long have you been training to be a prat your majesty." Colin spoke with confidence and a smirk. Bradley stepped forward, peering at Colin as thought to see if he was actually seriously challenging him like this. He reached to his waist, reaching for the sword that was quoted. 

Colin lunged forward, his fist towards Bradley's face, still ensuring even if Bradley failed to react it would barely graze him. Bradley was ready to act, grabbing hold of his arm, twisting it and pinning him between his leg and arm. "You will be imprisoned for that." He huffed, getting close to his face. 

"Who are you? The King!" Colin shot back sarcastically with labored breath. Bradley got closer to his face again, his stance unwavering. 

"His son, Arthur." Colin let his strong face fall, the fight drained out of him at that statement before Bradley dropped him. 

"That was brilliant, thank you." The director spoke with a genuine smile.

"Are you alright Colin, I didn't hurt you did I?" Bradley asked, helping him to his feet again. 

"No no, that was a good run." Colin replied, dusting himself off. He shifted into Arthur, allowing Colin to just return as Merlin, Bradley had embodied Arthur completely for the time when Merlin had first entered Camelot. An arrogant young man who felt he was above everyone due to his position. His father was to blame for that, Merlin had always blamed a lot of Arthur's pain on Uther, the arrogance before he saw the world and the complete naivety. Arthur had grown into his own man since those days and Colin now felt the excitement rising to not only be with Arthur once more but being able to see him develop as a character again. 

"You two have a brilliant on screen connection, it would be a delight to see you both play these characters together, I don't actually feel that you two should switch roles, you both seems so fit for the roles you have just presented to me." Colin nodded along with the directors comments Bradley clapping his hand on Colin's back. 

"I guess you are the Merlin to my Arthur then Colin." He had a wide grin, that quickly overtook Colin's face too. 

"Suppose I must be." Colin responded happily. Finally finding Arthur after all the loneliness and millennia. 

"I'm very glad to confirm that both of you have the job, I just wanted to ensure you had the on screen chemistry together and I wasn't dissapointed. Bradley if I could have you wait here for Anthony, it's just a small onscreen practice like this to confirm another role. You're more than welcome to stick around in the other room and wait for the other two, help yourself to the refreshments." He spoke to Colin who was more than content to move next door. A bite to eat would ease the slight light headedness he was now experiencing, giddy with the news of living his on screen life as Merlin. 

Colin headed out of the room with a final glance at Bradley, the pair exchanging an encouraging thumbs up to reassure the other. 

Colin stood in the empty waiting room, taking a much needed deep breath before tensing and relaxing his arms several times to try to disperse the pent up excitement inside him. He felt as he had not felt since those days in Camelot, the happiness and pride of his name, knowing he had Arthur and no matter what either of them face, they'd face it together.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thank you for reading and continuing to support this work. If you like it please let me know by dropping a kudos or a comment, both are greatly appreciated. XXxx

**Author's Note:**

> Thank you for reading so far, I'm so excited about this.   
> If you liked it please leave Kudos and a comment to let me know and I will make sure to continue updating! Xxx


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